How does one go about finding Heaven when you live in hell? I don't think I'm able to answer that. I try every day. Sometimes with success. =)
But usually it seems like a losing battle. Hell is all in my head, and Heaven is all around me. How do you get out of your head long enough to notice it? How do you shut up the critic that sits on your shoulder and whispers in your ear? That's the magic question isn't it?
I don't know the answers to my questions but I'm on a journey to find out. I guess it may always be this way for me. When ever things are going well I'll find a way to sabotage it. Misery loves company, they say and boy isn't that the truth?
There are two of me in my head. The happy pretty one with the great hubby and great kids. Then there is the other one that is short tempered jealous and spiteful. The bad me was created out of pain. Out of being abused, used, and treated like trash by the ones that were supposed to love and protect her. She is angry and can't let go.

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